Barriers and Roadblocks to Soul Progress: #10 – Persistent Procrastination | EP 047

Dr. Judith Holder: 00:00:06

Welcome to Mastering Life's Adventures, an educational podcast about tapping into your true self, the soul, your soul, the substance of your life, to discover what life's ups and downs are really about, and how to have a greater sense of purpose, peace, joy, and fulfillment. I'm Dr. Judith holder and your host, Coach psychologist Delos seeker, he enjoys diving into the connections between spirituality, psychology, wellness, and your everyday life's adventures. All comparing and polishing you like the fast is a magnificent diamond to be your best self. If you're craving more from your life, you are in the right place. Come let's journey together and transforming what you know. And to who you really are Mastering Life's Adventures begins now.

Dr. Judith Holder: 00:01:00

Hi, I'm back. Have you thought about the next barrier, and how it might affect the soul. And the next one I'm talking about is persistent procrastination, how my persistent procrastination affect your souls progress. But first, I want to talk about procrastination. When you think about procrastination, you think about delay, to doing something a task or putting something off until the last moment, it's like you're thinking about it and you're thinking about and you're thinking about it. And it's the 11th hour it needs to be done by the 12th hour and therefore, since you only now have another hour you try to cram everything into bear try to get it done. And this can be with school assignments or work tasks that need to be done, or projects that you're having to work on and make sure you have a time that you fulfill the timeline by which is needed. So procrastination happens and happens to many of us. This is not out of the ordinary. But we have to realize there are 20% of individuals, that it is kind of like a chronic habit. That it is kind of this habitual procrastination that happens to about 20% of people. And when that's happening to you, then that's where it might be helpful to seek some professional support, behavior health professional who can work with you more proactively on this. And what I'm talking about today is talking about overall procrastination, and not the kind of the habitual procrastination, which is affecting your home or sleep every area of your life. But these is more that is acute enough that it's affecting some areas of your life. And it does have an impact on your soul, progress your soul growth. With procrastination, as I've alluded to, it does involve avoidance behavior. And it does involve some degree of discomfort. That's why we're procrastinating because we're not liking the potential of what this may aspect or task or event or circumstances requiring us. We don't like it, and therefore we sit on it, so to speak. And this brings up that there are different aspects of procrastination, that might be good to talk about, and realizing that this is not the end all and be all. But these are some of the thoughts I had as relates to this persistent procrastination, that's occupying an aspect of our life, not our entire life. But we know when it relates to this type of person, or this type of event, or this type of circumstance, we tend to slow down and not do what is required of us or what is being expected of us to do or fulfill. So the different types of how procrastination shows up, is for example, when there is a lack of structure. When there's a lack of structure and we feeling that we need more structure, then we procrastinate. We kind of think about it, we kind of try to think about what type of structure are we tied even avoid it because it's not enough structure for us to be able to wrap our hands or our minds around in some way. So that's one way in which procrastination can show up. But also walls can show up which many people are familiar with it perfectionism that we need to get it just right. We need to do it just right. And so we procrastinate because we're feeling as if it's not perfect yet. But realize what I said to you before about mini episodes about the ego persona. The ego person Anna will be that aspect that has to be perfection has to be chess, right? Therefore, it's not worth doing since it's not perfect. Is that true? It's not true at all. It's better to do something than nothing better to put an effort for it, then not put an effort forward at all. The third way in which procrastination may show up, in which we're not aware of, and it's very subtle, and this is where the barrier comes into, to our own progress and advancement in our soul, is it can show up as self deception, that we deceive ourselves thinking, Oh, it's not going to take too much time. But we haven't given him really thought about the details, and what what is being asked or requested of us may take more time than we're giving you credit. Because we haven't done the detailed level of thinking about it. So that deception about wow, I thought it was gonna take only a couple of hours, but it took doubling or tripling the amount of time. And the key thing is, is do we learn from it from past experiences and know what types of time is needed to do certain things? And do we factor those things in. The other type of procrastination may show up in the form of not getting things done or moving forward is because we want to please others too much. When do you know we're pleat people pleaser, to the point that is hindering us, because we're not sure if a person's gonna like it or not like it, but this person might like it. But that person may not like it, therefore do I really want to do and because I want everyone to like it. And so we're basing our decisions and our thinking about other people liking it, versus is it the right thing for me to do with the information that I have currently. And let me move forward and put it out there for other people give feedback, and so then I'll have enough time to acclimate or change or to modify as needed. So so that's another aspect in terms of good that goes on with procrastination. Another one is the fifth and overcoming the odds. There are people who like an adrenaline rush, that means getting it done under the 12 hour just before 1159. And the bell strikes 12. Wow, we got it done. And we get this adrenaline rush that goes on. And that kind of spurs us along. And we have to be careful of that. Because we only can say we feel alive when we have that adrenaline rush. But is that true? No, not at all. How might it have an impact on our soul progress is but you're also thinking about. Now the next one is what I thought about was the sixth one would be you don't believe you will enjoy the task that's being asked for you to do. And so since you don't think you're going to be liked what you're going to have to do. And there's some decrease and complexity of the task or assignment that's given to you. You procrastinate. Don't think I'm gonna like this. So you kind of find a way to demotivate yourself to be doing it. And it may not be true, because hasn't it been times in which we thought we wouldn't like something. But once we got into it, hey, this is pretty good. This is not bad at all. And in fact, I'm liking this, I'm finding out new things I didn't find out before learning things that I wouldn't have learned otherwise. So the seventh one, and that relates to the procrastination and why it's taking place is rumination. We're ruminating about it. We're fixated on kind of maybe the negative thinking that's taken place with that particular issue or what's being requested of us to be done. And we're ruminating about oh my god, this person always asked me to do this. And I never liked this person nor like that, you know what they asked me to do? And I just don't want to do it. And that rumination, it may be we have the flip that rumination and saying, what are the possibilities here? And how might I grow from it? And again, we're thinking about it from the level of soul progress. Because some of these things I'm talking about stand as barriers to our soul progressing on its spiritual path, and achieving its best self, our best self. Now the next I'm just gonna talk about two more may be fear. By procrastinating protecting yourself from fear,

Dr. Judith Holder: 00:09:37

fear of, of what people may judges in the wrong way was similar to the other one I talked about, or fear that we're not going to do it right. Again, you see how these all tying together? Well, it's something I've talked about as well, but also the fear of judging by others. as well as be judging ourselves, being hyper ly critical of ourselves. And that feeling of being critical or condemning of ourselves, which I talked about in an episode, I believe it's in February, that it really moves us into stagnating. Because we're there's fear, there's usually a slowing down process and a hesitancy that takes place. And that we don't want to advance we don't want to engage because of fear of some type of pain, hurt or disappointment. Now another and the last one I talk about As for why we may go about procrastinating is this self defeating behaviors that were engaged in behaviors that gobbled up our time, like surfing the internet, or the social media platforms, because we really don't want to do this task. And now we've got a habit of always surfing the Internet where we don't want to do something. Or we may end up feeling as if it's going to impact our self confidence or self esteem in some ways. And so we engage in the self defeating behaviors, and slowing things down to a point that we don't make much progress or advancement. Therefore, we lose, not only attentiveness and doing what's being asked of us, but also lose focus. And so we end up doing other things. Because our focus has been broken. There aren't these different levels and reasons that go on with procrastination. And the drivers of procrastination is usually it boils down to, first and foremost a habit, but also to self confidence, or self esteem, types of issues, and fear, slash anxiety. And when we're feeling some degree of emotional fear, or anxiety or feeling upset about something, or beings want to ask, or feelings really act as static, and these negative types of feelings act as a barrier to our souls, ongoing need to evolve and grow. And we end up creating a sense of stubbornness, a sense that, well, but let me flip it, it can contribute to our sense of having low self esteem. And we want to do things that increase our self esteem, that allows us to feel like we're accomplishing and getting things done. So wouldn't procrastination be the opposite of us building self confidence? Having higher self esteem? How do we move in start thinking about confidence? And what what allow us to feel more confident in doing what is being requested of us? That is being asked of us to to do be a task? or be it a chore? You know, how can it help build self esteem, self confidence, empowering us to feel better? Maybe we need to start thinking from that vantage point. And use one of the qualities that I talked about, I believe it was in episode eight, and also opening up to your divinity, which is the ebook that I wrote. And maybe the way in which we flip this is move away from the things that create density. Yeah, yes, density, move away from those things that create density. And some of those things I've just already described. But what's density? And again, this is an episode eight, I talk a little bit more about this. And also the book, it's dense energy now secretly intensified towards you. Is dense energy now secretly intensified towards you, weighing you down, making you feel heavy, making you feel burden in some ways, because of this density, that procrastination can create. Specially if it's persistent procrastination, that it keeps on happening in a particular area of our life. It may not be pervasive like that 20% I talked about earlier, but it may be in a specific area that we know is shows and rears its head and that we tend to procrastinate. It may based upon the person and maybe based upon the situation, so start thinking about that. Because when we can live that density, and the avenue that we can do that is something I talked about in episode 38. And that's top. T O P, atop the T is training the mind. So what I'm asking you to do is train your mind to begin thinking differently about procrastination, and see it more as density, and how may I get on top of the density and that I don't have to go there. I don't have to go down that dead end road. And we're procrastination, I know will lead me because as you reflect, and you think about and have the higher view and get on top of these themes that are occurring with your procrastination, then we start to say, oh, okay, I understand. So my thinking about this, I just need I need to flip it on one of them and look at where is the point of energy for me in doing this? What additional questions do I need to ask? How do I need to know that this is all the habit that I've gotten myself into, I want to form a new habit by looking at this from chunking it down and looking at bite sized pieces by which I can go about taking on this particular task of our request that's being asked of me, that there's maybe little ways that we can inch our way through to help us to build a momentum of getting on top of our particular area that we find ourselves procrastinating around. So it's now moving you into what I talked about in that episode 38, of of the O in the O is really focused on opportunities. How this is situation? How does this request is an opportunity for my soul growth, my soul progress? How am I include my soul and undertaking this particular task? How might I ask myself? So asking your soul? How might I do this in a way that honors my soul? And don't forget a part of our soul is intuition. So it does require some quietness and or stillness to listen as you're walking or as you're driving your car. And you have the music turned off? Just asking the question. And listening. Oh, I can do this from this standpoint. Oh, I never thought about doing it in this particular way. Or I didn't ask this question, I need to ask this particular type of question. You're now in communion with your inner self, your soul self, the substance of your life, getting a better understanding of how to expand the situation and not allow the density of procrastination to settle in and keep you stuck or stymied in a particular way. Which is unique to you. Now the P, the P is related to privately being willing to check in with yourself. So as you're moving along with that particular task, or that particular project, you're checking in, how are we doing? How are we moving forward here? But more joy can we put into what we're doing? How can we help others in the project, as well as continue to do what we need to do in the project? How do we begin to privately start making shifts and changes and how we approach the particular project, if it's an individual project, or if it's with a team that we're working with, or it's with a chore that we're engaged in, and making it in sizable pieces, and then trying to infuse some joy, some humor, some engagement with others who may be doing something similar to what we're doing. So they're not feeling that we're doing it all by

Dr. Judith Holder: 00:19:17

ourselves, if it's persistent, because this is persistent procrastination, if it's persistent, that means this happening again and again and again. And the things that we do, he may not be that 20% of individuals who are going to procrastinate on everything that they do, but it may be significant enough, that is a theme, a pattern that you need to be able to address and look at, because where there is procrastination, there is going to be some resistance and with that resistance you need to look at what the resistance is around. And it usually ties into an emotional element of being and hurt or being disappointed, or feeling put upon, or a feeling as if people don't recognize or accept all the things you've already have done. It could be many different reasons. But if you're on a spiritual path, you're trying to figure out what it is, and then resolve it. And keep moving forward. This whole aspect that we're talking about is your soul always wants to use any task, any event, any circumstance, in any situation, as a modem, for self mastery, as a modem for gaining skills, talents, awareness, about yourself, about the situation you find yourself in, that allows you to be able to tune into something greater than yourself, tune into through your soul, You're mighty I Am Presence, you're God's source you're on. Again, you're tuning into something greater than yourself. Because what you're trying to ultimately do is take away the procrastination, and pass the test, pass the tests against you, mastery, take away procrastination and say, regardless, I'm doing it anyway. Because it's the right thing to do. It's the most harmonious thing for me to do. It is a way for me to continue to grow, advance and learn through my experiences. Because what procrastination does, it stops us from growing. It stops us from advancing. It stops us from being in tune with our soul need and soul evolution and growth and advancement. And we want to know that that substance of our life, which is our soul, which is that gold essence, which is that fabric, that we're tied into the greater sense of who God is, is who we are. The Why do you want to procrastinate, procrastination shrinks us. And inadvertently, it puts us in a straitjacket cuttings off from our souls need for growth and advancement. Procrastination, we do not realize it's another form, or we may realize it. It's another form of vacillating, and our decision making process stalling or even postponing. And maybe it may be due some degrees of inadequacy that we may have. But ultimately, procrastination, waste time. And time is very important to the soul's evolution. Procrastination still puts us in this not only straight Jack, but this gray zone of mediocrity of your own progress in movement forward. And those who are walking a spiritual path, have to realize if they're really serious about walking a spiritual path, have to realize that there are timetables by which your soul needs to move on that path. That is unique timetables to your soul, and his evolution. And you want to meet those timetables, because it allows you to be able to continue to accelerate in your growth and your advancement in having greater happiness, attunement, greater sense of balance and peace and a greater sense of inner calmness within you. That allows you expansiveness of all the gifts that your soul has to offer on planet Earth. One of the things I was thinking about with this procrastination is require something and it requires a superpower that I call discernment. Discernment, that we have to be able to look at things at a more discerning way. And when we're able to do that, and what I mean by discerning way is that we are willing to be able to slow things down. Not in the form of procrastination, which are delaying, avoiding or stopping or not doing something, but you're slowing it down on purpose in order to have a greater sense of attunement And that comes from listening. Being in listening grace, it's like asking yourself the question, we were talking about the thinking part of tops. And now you're observing what is coming into you. Because in that pause and asking your soul to question, it is your soul's higher source by which you're being guided by. And so you're to meet with your soul allows you to tune with that I Am Presence, your I Am Presence, you're God's source, the Atman, the brake light, whatever, again, you wish to call that source. I leave that up to you. But what you're learning to do is being willing to be obedient to what you hear as the response or the prompt that comes back to you as what you need to do in the particular situation that you're finding yourself in, that you made for procrastinating around. In some ways, with that particular work project, or that particular assignment that you're doing, you are willing to be able to ask your ears up, what do I need to do here? How might it be best for me to do it? What is it missing here? That I need to know, because our higher self knows so much more than our ego persona. And procrastination comes out of the ego persona, because it's trying to figure out it from a lower standard. But the God source is the highest standard that we can figure things out by and be guided by Him may be with that particular assignment or task that we're doing, we may find out, you know what, maybe I need to do it in a different way. Maybe, I need to say, I'm not sure if I'm going to be able to do it, because of all the other things on my plate right now. And can I get to it by certain date and time and negotiate a little bit. So that you're also thinking about when others are involved, and maybe they can take the first leg of things, and you take the second leg or the third leg, and you then work together to get the rest of it done. There may be different types of modifications to your pausing, listening, that your NSL says, Once you try doing it this way, I'll look at it from this perspective or direction. It's allowing you through that pause, and a willingness to ask for greater discernment about how you need to proceed, which is the higher road in which you're trying to take. It's like those old cars, you know, I'm not sure they're all now. But you used to have a stick shift. And I'm not sure if these people still have stick shifts, but you put it in different gears, or you're putting in a different gear, which is like a different frequency, which is your Higher Self, your soul self that you're asking things by so that it allows that attunement that you're having with your higher self, to be able to move to a different frequency. And you're hearing things from a different frequency, and you're being moved forward in a different way than just trying to do it or not do it which happens with procrastination. What we're actually doing then, is we're moving ourselves to greater inner attunement. So Christ, God presents, we're having the to meet with our spiritual self, to know how we need to proceed and move forward.

Dr. Judith Holder: 00:28:57

And that allows us then to move to God's glory, and work through us and all that we do in our activities that we have going on to the glory of God, to glorify God in the things that we do. We want to expand God's awareness of himself by us being the best self that we can be in our interactions. And in anything that is being requested of AI whenever you feel a sense of procrastination, it is really a ripe time to say up. What's up. Why am I procrastinating around this? And how does it hinder a help my self confidence? How does it hinder and help my soul advancement and where there is so advancement, there is also self confidence which is Inc east south elevation of who you are. So all experiences that we are engaged in, is trying to help us to better walk the spiritual path. And wherever there is procrastination, it usually does involve some level, the ego persona, which I've talked about before, that we want to say no to the ego persona. And we just want to say yes to our awareness that God is within us, that we are here to glorify all that God is in our interactions and to learn certain lessons. Something to think about. Bye for now.